a new perspective on faith for a crazy world

Archive for May, 2017

Relationships are not Doritos chips

MultiRacialThumbsUpComplexity of character and culture

There’s no question that we live in an extremely diverse world. We ignore that fact at our own peril. And the diversity extends not only to an assortment of climates, environments, chemical elements, species, races and cultures, but also to the subject of character itself.

At a recent relationship workshop, the presenter was making a point about what attracts people to each other. He likened personality characteristics to a #Doritos chip, saying that the cunning food companies have developed a theory of four basic “tastes” — sweet, salty, bitter, and savory. And the #Doritos recipe, of course, includes all four of these, so in theory it satisfies everyone, and you can’t stop eating their chips for that very reason.

If the chip had only one of these flavors — sweet, for example — you’d soon tire of it and begin wanting something else. That’s called flavor “satiation.”

Personalities, he continued, have similar emotional “flavors.” And a “nice guy,” for example, might fit the stereotype of “sweet” or “comfortable” (or platonic) — but if too much “niceness” exists, then satiation sets in, and the natural inclination is to seek another flavor. Like naughty. Or mysterious. Or funny and playful. Mischievous. Warm and understanding. Even dangerous! (Of course, focusing instead on any one of these alternative “flavors” has problems of its own, but we don’t need to go into that.)

The takeaway from all this is, more than likely, that complexity of character is valued more highly than a more boring, one-dimensional outlook on life.

All this marketing wisdom, mind you, was offered from a purely practical viewpoint. There’s a germ of truth there, but there’s also the higher perspective that has to be considered. If you extend this thinking to the world at large, with its many diverse cultures, that means we should all be seeking and appreciating a more complex experience that encompasses many different countries, peoples, spiritual and religious ideas, political persuasions, etc., …correct?

So current global movements away from diversity or inclusivity (out of fear of immigrants, refugees, “foreign” ideas, etc.) is actually counterproductive according to this “taste” theory. That’s the practical side. On the spiritual side, being opposed to diversity means we’re cutting off our nose to spite our face. We live in such a diverse, interconnected web of existence that it would be foolish and not very compassionate or neighborly (brotherly, sisterly) of us to automatically exclude or shut the door on others who don’t look, act, dress, eat, work, play, or believe like us. A steady diet of “white bread” alone would quickly lead to satiation and worse — racial warfare, religious discrimination, political chaos, new Holocausts, you name it.

So, to do anything less than welcome the outsiders, those who are different from us, is a very bad — even evil — notion!

And when it comes to complexity of character (whether it’s nice guys or naughty guys), it’s never really as simple as that. Everyone has a certain degree of complexity of character. To dwell on strictly superficial aspects, like the #Doritos marketers believe, is also asking for trouble. How we come across to others is important, but if we subscribe to the idea that you can’t be “nice” or “warm” because it’s too boring or one-dimensional, then we’re also giving in to a very cold, cruel, calculating, manipulative view of human relationships.

Enjoy your #Doritos!

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